During last night’s dinner conversation we touched the subject of male listening skills. As someone at the table was describing how they “fake listen”, the server heard and agreed. I thought it was interesting how the server heard our conversation, good listening skills, I suppose.
It was a funny conversation, but the awareness of listening was heavy on my heart this morning. When I do find myself “really truly” listening, I recieve a different insight about the person and myself.
I am a woman, I am clear about it and good with it. Now that does not mean I am problem free. When I share a problem with a man (or woman), I am not looking for someone to solve my problem. Sometimes the person tries so hard to solve my problem, it turns out to be a debate, argument or better yet, we go into all my past mistakes! Arghhhhh!
When someone is rushing to speak, or has to interrupt, because they need to get their point across, then the conversation is all about them. (Can you say….”EGO”?)
Have you ever noticed someone really listening to you? I start thinking to myself, “Yikes, they’re really listening to me”! Then I think to myself, this person is different, in a special way.
Listening is a skill. How are your listening skills? When I go into my “active listening mode”, I find people will open up and begin to deal with their own issues. Encouragement is an ingredient for discovery.
Proverbs 15:4 says “The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life”, it does not say …”a tongue that tells people what they should do or supposed to do, or how to think will encourage them to love their life”!!!
- Limit your talking (Eph. 4:29). I am the worst at this! arghhhhh
- Ask good questions (Gen 3:9, 2 Kings 2:9, John 5:6, Luke 18:41).
- Listen to the answers (Gen 3:10, 2 Kings 2:9, John 5:7, Luke 18:41).
- Listen to the exact words, the intent (Gen 6:14, Josh 6:4, John 14:6).
- Recognize the power of non-verbal communication (Mark 5:27, Matthew 8:15, Mark 8:23, Luke 22:61).
- Listen and consider ethnic, culture and life experiences (Acts 8:31).
Thanks for listening….In-Joy, Holly